Striking Out: Failing at Dating

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I went on two dates last week and neither went well at all. I don’t know what is wrong with me but I have just been striking out on my dates recently. On the first date, we went to a tapas restaurant. He was from Mexico and worked for Microsoft. (In the first email that he sent to me he asked me if I would be interested in a green card marriage.) I was a little bit late (due to the fact that I am a terrible driver and have trouble getting anywhere even with GPS.) We had not sat down 5 minutes and I was doing all of the talking. I would ask him questions and he would give me one word answers. (It was kind of like talking to a wall.)  He was on his phone a lot. It was awkward. Then when I got home, he texted me and said “I had a great time. I hope we could do it again soon.” I have not heard from him since.

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( At least I got a glass of wine out of it.)

I went on a date to the Wine Loft just get a drink (easier to escape if it goes bad.)  He was a 40 year old guy that worked with computers. He was nice and we chatted. (Again I had to do most of the talking.) Then at the end of the date he asked me for my phone number so we could get together again.) I have not heard from him since.

If a guy is not interested in me that is fine but why waste my time or say they want to get together again.

 

Sunday Reflections: EMS, Yes Man and The Naked Truth

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Ambulance

Recently I have started going to church again. (If you have read any of my previous post you know I need to get right with Jesus.) I have been going to the same Methodist church on and off since the 6th grade. My Mom and step dad actually met at the church. So I started going again 3 weeks ago and last week the pastor, Talbot started a series of messages called trending. The theme of the series is evaluating your personal relationship with Jesus Christ. Talbot is a great speaker an interesting guy. He went to Princeton on a tennis scholarship and speaks fluent Spanish. So last week during the first message a special needs boy had a seizure. (If I had a medical emergency ideally I would be in a hospital but my second choice would be church.) Talbot was calm and cool as a cucumber. Several medical professionals at the service assisted the boy until the EMT’s arrived and Talbot lead everyone in pray until the boy was taken away by EMT’s on a stretcher. Then Talbot related that incident back to the message. It was crazy but luckily the boy was ok.

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So this week the message was titled “Yes Man” based on Proverbs 15:31-32.

(31) Whoever heeds life-giving correction will be at  home among the wise.

(32) Those who disregard discipline despise themselves, but the one who heeds correction gains understanding.

Talbot called Proverbs the advice section of the bible. (It is kind of like Dear Abby for everyday problems.) A yes man is a person that agrees with everything a person says. Everyone has an inter yes man that justifies their own behavior. It is important to have people in your life that can tell you the hard truth and not just agree with every scatterbrained idea that pops into your head. We are the masters of self-deception and if we don’t check our “yes man” than we will have many regrets.

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I think that this is so true. I know there is a crazy person that lives inside me that justifies my makeup addiction every time I go to Ulta. I have a lot of hair brained ideas and it is so easy for me to justify these ideas to myself. Usually this just leads to heartbreak and regrets. I don’t want to live a life full of regrets and I want to be a better person. I am planning to join a life group at my church and surround myself with more positive influences.

Naked Dating Episode 5

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Last night’s episode of Naked Dating was entertaining was usual yet somehow managed to lower the bar. If online dating does not work out for me there is always  Dating Naked. The show focused around Mike and Candace. Mike was a 27year old (sexy) account from Long Island, New York. Candace was a 27 year old bartender from Post Falls, Idaho. She liked to shot guns and hunt. In usual Dating Naked fashion, their first date was with each other. Their date was a jungle obstacle course with zip lining. (Again, something I would not want to do naked.) After the date they went back to the villa and had a meal together. They have a great connection and made out in the pool.

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On date number two, Mike went out with Diana from New Jersey. She laughed a lot and loved the Jersey Shore. They played croquet and had tea. Diane thought that Mike was “the one” which was really awkward because he could not wait to get away from her. Candace went out with JD. He was a fire fighter from Los Angeles. For their date they went on a naked bike ride around the island. (That seems like it would be uncomfortable.) Then they had drinks on the beach and he put all his cards on the table. (Candace was not really sure what card game they were playing but felt no connection.) Back at the Villa it was fun with the two crazies.  Mike and Candace wanted to spend time with each other and had no interest in the other dates. They were able to get away from their dates .They hung out in a hammock, had a deep conversation and made out. Back at the house Diane was drunk and had a breakdown because Mike ditched her. (I think she is giving crazy Katie a run for her money as my favorite person on the show.)  Then her eye makeup was all over her face and she looked like a raccoon. (She should have gone with waterproof mascara.)

Amber

Mike went on this third date with Amber. She looked like a model.  They had a flirty massage date. Amber tells him on the date that she had a boyfriend and they broke up.  She was a lesbian for four year after the breakup and now she is dating guys. She dates a lot and has even met a date at a stoplight. (That sounds dangerous.)  Candace went on her third date with Marcus.  They built and flew a kite on their date. Then they danced naked in the water and Candace was swept off her feet. Back at the villa both Mike and Candace were torn between each other and their third date.  Then Candace gave Mike “the look” for him to meet her and she left. Diane got drunk and told Amber that Mike had ditched her the night before to spend time with Candace. Amber egged her on and she and Mike had a confrontation. In the meantime, Candace was tired of waiting for Mike and Marcus used the opportunity to spend some alone time with Candace. They made out.  Mike finally got away Diane and when to find Candace but she was with Marcus. (Scandalous) Then it was time to choose. Mike picked Candace because he thought they had a real connection. Candace picked Marcus because Mike left her hanging.

What did you think of this episode of Naked Dating?

Things that Bother Me: Just Rude or a Northern Thing?

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Hey Guys! I thought that I would do something a little different today and make a video. I went on a date tonight so I had my makeup and hair done. (I’ll write about it later.) Just thought I would go something different. Yes, I make a lot of weird expressions and crazy eyes.

Robin Williams Has Died + My Thoughts on Depression

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Jumanji

Yesterday Robin Williams was found dead in his home. The official cause of death is asphyxia by hanging. He was battling severe depression before his death. He was only 63.

I remember growing up watching Aladdin, Mrs. Doubtfire, Jumanji and Hook. Robin Williams was a part of my childhood. He was extremely talented and his movies touched many people. He left this world too soon and will be missed. I hope he rest in peace. My thoughts and prayers go out to his family and friends.

My Thoughts on depression

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I think as a society we trivialize mental health. Now it seem like everyone has anxiety and depression and doctor’s handout anti-anxiety medication like its candy. It is trendy. People throw the word depression like it is nothing like “My sandwich is stale. I’m depressed” No you are sad. When I worked at a law firm in the Social Security department 18 year olds would call up and ask for assistant with getting disability for their depression. Then I would ask some basic screening questions like have you been diagnosed by a doctor, are you on any medications for mental health and does it interfere with your life. 9 times out of 10 all of the answers are no. People like this make mental health look like a joke.

Many people think that someone with depression should “get over it”, go to therapy and get medication. Medication is not some magic pill that turns you into a Disney character. It is not that is simple. Depression is an ongoing battle that is an everyday struggle even with medication and therapy. No one chooses to have a mental illness so telling someone to get over it is just cruel. Depression is a disease like diabetes. So if you know someone that has struggles with ongoing depression and is in therapy and on medication be supportive and not a judgmental prick. (Trust me you are not helping)  If you are someone that is struggling with ongoing depression even though you have been on every anti-depressant under the sun and therapy, you are not alone. Know that you are in my thoughts and prayers every day.

Dating Disaster: I am Really Off my Game

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americas-next-top-model-antm-awkward-gifI am back in the dating game and it is not going well. I decided to step up my game from Plenty of Fish to Match.com hoping that if people are willing to spend money to join then they would be more serious about finding a relationship. I joined and did not get much of a response. Slowly after a little while I started to get a few messages.I got an email proposing marriage so the guy could get a green card. (Wow, I can’t believe my love life has been reduced to a green card marriage.) Well, anyway hard pass on that. (I am not that desperate)

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Last night I went out on a date with a guy that I meet on Match.com. He was a 31 year old lawyer. (I use to work at a law firm and all of the lawyers were crazy, so I was a little skeptical but he was cute.) We meet at 7:15 PM at Thai Taste. We sat down. After we had only been sitting maybe 2 minutes he told me that drank every night since Wednesday and that tonight he wanted to call it an early night. Then he ordered a beer. (I thought to myself wow what I did in in less than 5 minutes that this guy can’t wait to get away from me as soon as possible.) We ordered our food quickly and started chatting about basic get to know you stuff. I mentioned that I liked listen to podcast when I run. He asked me which ones I liked to listen to and I said I liked to listen to Dave Ramsey. He then said” That’s weird. All of those financial gurus are quacks.” (I guess wanting to be debt free is crazy talk.) Our food arrived and we ate in silent. Then we got the check and left before 8:00 PM. I spent over an hour doing my hair and makeup and getting ready for the date and it was less than 45 minutes. I think this is the worst first date that I have ever had. There is definitely not going to be a second date.

Naked Dating Episode 4

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Titanic

(Titanic Moment with alcohol is so on my bucket list)

This week on my favorite dating reality show that I love to hate featured Chuck and Camille.  Chuck is from Miami and he sells ladies swimwear. Chuck is a little bit out there but he owns it. I respect that. Camille is a bartender from Las Vegas. She has a lot of tattoos.  As per the usual Chuck and Camille’s first naked date was with each other and they went sailing. Chuck was not Camille’s type but something tells me he could have charmed the pants off a grizzly bear.  They had a Titanic moment on the sail boat. After the date they went back to the villa and went skinny dipping (Duh it is Dating Naked) and made out. Camille was not impressed.

 

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(Camille and Robert playing the pool)

 On the second date Chuck went out with Kristen and they did archery and they kissed. Then they drank wine and Kristen taught him how to properly drink wine. During the conversation, in one sentence Kristen says how much she wants a relationship and then in the next she tells him about the kinky stuff she is in to. (Perfect conversation for a first date) Camille went out with Robert and he was ridiculously good looking. They played pool and there was a lot of touching. Then they made cigars and drank whiskey. (Good job, VH1 getting the most out of their money by getting some free labor out of the daters.)  Chuck tells her that he was engaged and Camilla thought he might be a little too young her.  At the villa, Chuck showed up naked. Chuck tried to get invited into Kristen’s room and she would not let him in. (LOL) Camille spent the night with 22 year old hottie Robert.

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( Chuck may be a weasel but I think he might be right)

On the third date Chuck went out with Michelle. They built a raft and paddled out to this dock like thing and had drinks. Chuck got another kiss (3 for 3).Camille went out with Julian. He had tattoos and an edgy look but was a little weird. Camille did not like it.  They went on a yoga date (Yoga another thing I would not want to do naked too much bending over).  Julian was very excited on the date. (So awkward)  After the dates were over all of the daters went back to the villa. Chuck again showed up naked. Chuck was torn between Michelle and Kristen. So he made out with Michelle and then made out with Kristen.  Kristen and Chuck shared a kiss goodnight and then Michelle was pissed. Camille and Robert make out in a hammock. Camille picked Robert. (Duh) Chuck picked Kristen.

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( Katie, my favorite person on the show so far.)

Thoughts: I feel that with every episode it gets a little crazier. I wonder where VH1 find these people. (Maybe Jerry Spring rejects? It that is the case it is very likely that someone I know will be on the show next.) I know these people say that they have tried everything and naked dating as a last resort. I think that they just want to be on TV and act as crazy so they can to get more time on TV. Crazy Katie was hilarious. I can’t hate on it completely because it is kind of entertaining and somehow makes me feel like I am not completely failing at life.

Dating Hiatus is Over?

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max-alone-50Sometimes I wish I could be a singer/ songwriter like Taylor Swift and get through my man troubles with a song. Unfortunately I have no musical ability what so ever. I am actually tone def. I am doing the world a favor by only sing in my car alone. Over the past few weeks, I have been on a dating hiatus. I tried Plenty of Fish and it was a disaster. On the plus side I now have some interesting stories. It was kind of draining. Right when I decided to go on a dating hiatus my ex decided to come around again. (Oh Joy) We dated in college and we were engaged to be married on August 4, 2012. We had some issues and called it off. It was a really hard time for me in my life. We have not really talked in two years.  He contacted me again in June and it has been an emotional roller coaster. He was unnecessarily cruel. At one point he told me that he never loved me. It ripped open an old scar but I am done wasting my tears on someone that does not give a damn about me. I honestly think that if you purposely play with someone’s heart than Karma with come back on you ten hold.  I have taken sometime to myself and I’m so over it. I think that in a way I was holding on the past because I really loved him but it was not meant to be. My pain is gone and I’m moving on. I’m ready to get back on the horse and ending my dating hiatus. I have realized that I really do want to find someone. I am not sue that will happen but at least it will be entertaining.

Guilty Pleasure T.V Married at First Sight: Moving In

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The honeymoon is over and the couples are moving in together. Which couples will grow closer and which couples will crumble under the pressure?

Jamie and Doug- Doug lives with his parents. (I hope that I don’t live with my parents at thirty.) Jamie is a little concerned that he lives with his parents but he explains that he had some debt and got laid off.  They decide to get an apartment together and Jaime is going to keep her apartment.  They go apartment hunting and find literately the saddest looking apartment in New York. They move in together and they seem to be happy.

Monet and Vaughn-Vaughn lives in New Jersey and she lives in Harlem. They both really like their places but Vaughn agreed to move in. They decide to pay the rent 50/50. Vaughn moves in and there is already friction between them. I find them both annoying and they seem so immature. I guess they belong together.

Cortney and Jason- He live with his mother due to her cancer and she lives in a one room apartment with a curtain separating her and her roommate. The couple talks about finances and Cortney has a lot of debt but they decide to get their own place. They go apartment hunting and all Cortney wants is a bedroom door. They find a cute little one bedroom apartment for $2400 a month. (New York is so expensive! How does anyone manage to live there?)  Moving is stressful for both of them but they are excited to live together.

DANCE MOMS IS BACK!

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 ( My face watching this episode.)

It has recently come to my attention that there are new episodes of Dance Moms! I’m so excited. It is like my favorite show. I am not sure why. It is like when there is a car crash on the side of the road and you can’t look away. I was watching it one day and my dad asked me if I was watching a documentary about child abuse. The funny part is that now my dad is addicted Dance Moms. I know that I have been doing a lot of reality show reviews recently but that’s just where I am at emotionally and I have some other ideas in the works.

In the last episode, the new team completed against the ALDC team. Now it is like a Wild West show down between the new team moms and the ALDC dance moms.  There is so much mama drama. At pyramid Abby tells the moms she is not taking crap from the moms. (I feel like she said that every episode.)   Maddie is moved back to the original ALDC team. (I loved her in the Sia music video.) Chloe is on top of the pyramid this week. (Yay, I am happy for her.)This week they are going to West Virginia. Both teams are completing. Makenzie and Sarah have solos. The new team is performing “the rapture” because they don’t have Maddie anymore. The original ALDC is doing a contemporary dance called “light as a feather stiff as a board” It is about a group of girls at a sleepover and Chloe is possessed by an Ouija board. How Abby does came up with this stuff?

Christ-y (Sarah’s mom and her face looks like a thumb) is stirring the pot between the new team and the old team. Christ-y over hears the mothers in the hallway talking crap about her. Chrsit-y starts yelling and then she gets in a physical altercation with another one of the moms on the new team. This bald man jumps out of nowhere and tried to break up the fight. (It was awesome.) Abby makes Christ-y apologies to the other lady or her daughter will be pulled from the dance. Jill calls out Abby and says that she only allowed the moms that were in the brawl stay because their kids keep age range down. Mackenzie preforms an acrobatic routine called “watch me fly “.She kills it like the junior pop star that she is. Then it is Sarah’s turn and she performs a contemporary number called” scary little monster”. I think Sarah is a talented little girl and she did a nice job. I feel bad that her mother is so crazy. The new team has amazing costumes and their dance is amazing. The original ALDC may not have had the amazing costumes, music or choreography that the new team had but they danced like they were dancing for their supper that night. Sarah’s solo comes in fourth place and Mackenzie comes in first place. In the group awards the original ALDC comes in second and the new team comes in first. The original ALDC moms are pissed. The girls are upset and Abby tells them that life is not fair. Abby is just keeping it real.

This episode was crazy. I don’t know how all of these kids are not in therapy. Normally I think that Abby is trying to toughen up the girls for the real world of hard core professional dancing but I think that having the two teams is kind of ridiculous. Abby just seems tired and burned out from all the drama (and filming all of her reality shows.) The new team moms just seem trashy and annoying. To be fair this is a reality show on Lifetime.

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